During a recent conversation, I shared how I enjoy viewing the lights of the S.F. Bay Area from the hills that rim the bay. In my mind it becomes a puzzle. I like to identify the various roads, buildings, and landmarks from my many travels throughout the region. I will usually then drift to think about all the people I have known and wonder where they are now.
Murphy’s Law states that friends come and go, but enemies accumulate.
I’m quickly approaching the three year mark where the emotional abuse was reaching its zenith and I was served with a stack of legal paperwork. When a conversation drifts to all that has happened in the past eight years (former spouse’s battle with cancer, divorce, and moving on), many wise sages will say to forgive and go live your life. Some go as far as to say that I need to let go of my bitterness? All good advice.
Don’t judge a man until you have walked two moons in his moccasins.
~ Native American Proverb ~
As I ponder what these wise sages have advised, I come away thinking that what some see as bitterness is really the fact that divorce rips apart one’s emotional foundation and leaves a scar. I know that over time the scar will fade, but it will also be a reminder of the broken trust, promises, and lies.
Judge not, and you shall not be judged. Condemn not, and you shall not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.
~ Jesus ~
I am learning that forgiveness is a process. You can forgive, or be forgiven, and move forward knowing that all is well. Then something comes out of left field and you find yourself back to square one. When one person becomes part of this forgiveness cycle, you begin to question just how long it will last? Jesus’ instructions to His followers is quite clear. Never stop forgiving.
Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.
~ Jesus ~
Tomorrow is a new day. What has happened in the past cannot be changed but I can learn from the experience. We can plan for our future but it can change very quickly. Nobody knows what the future will be for their life. We just have the here and now. Forgiveness is a choice that sets us free. Be in the moment and choose to be happy.